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Saturday, April 17, 2010

Words

Sometimes I pluck them from thin air. Sometimes I weight them carefully. Sometimes they roll around in my head for days, weeks even, just waiting for the right time to spill out through my fingers onto the screen of my computer.

Some words never leave my head. They stay there, forgotten, because I have moved on from whatever moment they were chosen for. Sometimes I think I have already written them down, recorded them here, when in fact I haven't.

Sometimes no words come. I try to pull them from me but I pull out nothing instead.

Sometimes I wonder if it matters. These words in my head or on the screen in front of me. These black lines against a white background.

What do they mean to me? What do they mean to you?

Sometimes I wish I could read my words outloud to you instead of having them echo only in your head. Do you pause where I would pause? Do you hear my sarcasm or my smiles?

These words help me to tell my stories. Sometimes I feel like choosing them, writing them, changing them, loving them, hating them, is also my story.

9 comments:

  1. I think the words you choose are so well thought out and appropriate. I know what you mean about choosing them... sometimes I have a hard time finding the right words, or I use the wrong words, or no words come at all. How do you get out of a dry spell? Read the dictionary perhaps!

    What will you do with your blog once your children are grown? Do you think you'll keep writing it?

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  2. I think your words are well thought out and appropriate. But I know what you mean about choosing your words. Sometimes I spend too long trying to choose the right words, or I choose the wrong ones, or none come to me at all. What will you do with your blog once your children are grown? Do you think you'll keep writing it?

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  3. Based on the reactions I've gotten to some of my blog posts, I know that others often don't read what I read in my head. I have learned to let go of my need to always be perfectly understood. But it's hard, I'll admit it.

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  4. Words are amazing things aren't they? You definately have a voice and I hope it is your voice - it sounds like a speaking voice :)thats how well you use your words.

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  5. @Vicky I don't know how one gets over a dry spell. Just keep writing I guess. But I have been feeling like the words are harder to come by lately.

    I don't know what will happen with the blog as the kids get older. I'll still be a mom, right, so I guess I could keep bloggin here.

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  6. Sometimes I don't write for a couple of weeks if that happens. It's hard to always have the words. It's hard to find the energy to feel well written some days ;)

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  7. Have you considered opening up more? You have beautiful words and beautiful stories, but most times it seems that you are holding back a lot... the real reasons why you write what you do. We, as readers/mothers, can usually relate to what you`re saying, or guess what the real problem/situation is because we`ve been there, but we would get to know you even better if you shared more. Perhaps you`re not ready for that. Or maybe you`ll never want to share more than you already do. That`s ok too. I (along with many others) am still a big fan of your blog and your words. Thanks! :-)

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  8. You have such wonderful words. I am sure once the kids are grown this space will become fully yours. I often wish there was a way to get the words out without having to sit at the computer. A mind to blog translator. It would save me so much time! :)

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  9. I always like coming to read your words. Always gets me thinking

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