Life can be hard. I have had my fair share of struggles in my life. I still struggle. Some days I struggle to be patient with a boy who wakes multiple times at night and wants to start his day at 4am. I struggle with a girl who is, well, three. I struggle to find the time and energy to connect with the husband. Those struggles sometimes overwhelmed me. They make me feel inadequate and insufficient. But really? My hard is privileged.
My house is standing. My kitchen is stocked with fresh food and clean drinking water runs through my taps. My children are alive and healthy. They are clothed and fed and loved. They are entertained and educated and encouraged. Because really? My children are privileged.
Money is tighter now then it has been before and than it will be when we are both working again. We are careful how we spend our money. We pay our bills and the girl's preschool and we discuss any other major purchases together. We feel like we have no money even though the husband has a regular paycheck, we have savings to draw from and I could return to work if it was necessary. So really? We are privileged.
I haven't been watching the news of Haiti because we don't have cable. I haven't searched out pictures of the devastation online. I don't feel like I need a visual of the destruction because the pictures I have imagined in my mind are enough for me. Instead, I listen to the radio and pause whatever I am doing when news of Haiti comes on.
Since the earthquake I have felt like we needed to do sometimes. Today we finally sat down and made an online donation to the Canadian Red Cross effort in Haiti. It is not as big a donation as I would like to have made, but it is something. Perhaps we will donate again later. Because giving to Haiti? It is my privilege.