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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Friends

Before I had kids I looked for friends with the same soci-political beliefs as me, friends that had something in common with my own background (neighbourhood, school, family circumstances), friends that had similar taste in books and movies and friends that loved to eat at restaurants as much as I did.

After the girl was born I looked for friends with similar parenting philosophies, friends that also co-slept, cloth diapered and breastfed and friends with babies who never slept and would understand why I was so tired and strung-out.

Since the boy was born I have refined my friendship criteria. Now I only look for three things in a friend. Can I still tolerate to be around them after a night of disrupted sleep. Do(es) their child(ren) drive me crazy after being in contact with them for an extended period of time. Will they listen to me complain about the girl, the boy, the husband, myself and still talk to me afterwards.
That is the making of a good friend. The best kind.

5 comments:

  1. I just look for someone that will hang with me - and not mind that I might smell like poop and have ketchup in my hair.

    Our standards change, don't they?

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  2. When my kids were born I knew very few people in this city. It was when I started to go stir crazy and to out to hit the parks and playgroups that I met many of the women that are now my closest friends, my posse. They have seen me through thick and thin, and vice versa.

    I have friends of all political and social stripes, but I wonder if it's more than coincidence that these women also see the world like I do?

    Hmm, food for thought...

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  3. Well, I think I fit into all the categories above - and as the added bonus - I have no sense of smell! :)

    And Theo loves the girl (he doesn't really know the boy yet - we should remedy that some time!)!

    Have a great day!

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  4. How life changes as we age. One of my favorite things in a friend is someone who will coffee in the afternoon and the occasional beer at the pub in the evenings.

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